When it comes to travel, I have two brains. Actually, I have a lot of different brains, none of which work or communicate with the others as well as I’d like. But for our purposes here, let’s concentrate on these two: Discovery Brain and Reflective Brain.
The former kicks in on a trip where I’m whiplashed with wonder. Everything is new, interesting, and worthy of my attention. I’m curious, energetic, and more than a little hyper. There’s so much to see, do, and experience that I can’t seem to settle down.
Even if I park myself at a lovely café and tell myself to process all I’m taking in, it doesn’t work. Discovery Brain is like a cross between a demanding child and the Energizer Bunny. It shuts down only with exhaustion and starts back up the next day with even greater intensity.
Until I get home.
Then I shift into Reflective Brain. If Reflective Brain wore an outfit, it would involve tweed and leather patches. And loafers for pacing slowly. Maybe bunny slippers. With Reflective Brain, I review my journal. I try to understand what I’ve seen or even how the trip has re-created me. I dive into the photos I’ve taken and look for surprises. And then it happens.
I want a do-over.
Inevitably, I will have missed something. Or in understanding an experience, I’ll realize there was more to it than I grasped. I can read the exact research (articles, guidebooks, blog posts, etc.) that I’d consumed before the trip, but now, with the experience of having been there, I understand it in a new way. But I also understand that I didn’t get the whole picture while on my trip. When I read about the food, I now know what it tasted like. But I also realize I should have ordered this or that as well.
When I revisit a paragraph describing a particular scene, I can see it in a way I couldn’t before. Which all sounds great. But with it comes the sense that I didn’t see and appreciate all that I could have.
Reflective Brain starts screaming at Discovery Brain: “How could you have overlooked this? Why didn’t you pursue that?” And Discovery Brain replies, “Well where were you all that time, you FOMO-obsessed so-and-so? Why didn’t you process all this on site and help me focus on these key areas at the time?” And both of them want a do-over.
Only do-overs are like comb-overs. They may seem like a good idea at the time. But what they look like in reality isn’t quite what you were hoping for. And it certainly doesn’t fool anyone else.
Even if you could go back right away, you’re likely still too close to your previous experience there to really see much with new eyes. Plus, you can’t escape this: You just can’t see, experience, or process everything. Ever.
So when you feel like you want a do-over trip, take one. Just do so in your head (assuming there’s room with all those competing brains at work).
As you reflect on a trip, don’t give into the no-win thinking of “If only…” Instead, value what you did experience. Replay the scenes, the meals, the sights, the laughs. Forget about what you might have done. Appreciate what you did, what you gained, what you became.
I know I’m making a big deal about something seemingly small. But many travelers experience post-trip blues. And one of the best cures is to bring Discovery Brain (that you used so much on the trip) back into the mix to aid, rather than compete with, Reflective Brain. Discover the deeper meaning, the true lessons learned from your trip.
You don’t need to physically go back for a do-over. You’re carrying everything you need up in your noggin. Discover the trip within your trip and you won’t want a do-over.
You’ll be too busy appreciating what you had and all the layers of that deeper trip that are just waiting to be further discovered.
This article first appeared on stevebrock.substack.com
